I've learned that i have a bad habit...which is being straight forward...some ppl might be saying that it's a good thing instead of bad because there are ppl around us who are wearing a thick thick mask which can change from time to time to different ppl....scary huh? but that's not my topic this time...
Back to my topic...being straight forward is very subjective...but being sensitive in what i heard but not sensitive while talking leads me to a lot a lot of problem...thanks to my dear dear who reali reminding me this....
I have this bad habit...i listen to what ppl tell me...if from my friend, i'll be sensitive...sensitive in a sense that easily being hurt....but when i talk, i din know it will offend anyone as i din know that i'll have such an impact in ppl's heart...so i din analyse my words before it comes out from my mouth...or chinese called it as "din go thru my brain before i talk"...
I have a friend whom i knew during primary but we wasn't close until secondary school...around form 3 i think...i remembered so clear that i went to her house whenever i wanted to do revision...kononnya revision but actually watch animation together...sharing same big container of ice cream...gossip together...then go to school together.... She is reali my bestie...my BEST BEST EVER friend.... I share my every single secret with her....i shared my everything which is inside my inner heart... I be friend with her with my whole heart i swear....
But everything started to change when i started to become a prefect....(before prefect i was a pengawas koperasi with her) After i became a prefect, she is still a pengawas koperasi....but still i try to talk to her...but i feel that she is having her own circle of friends and da gap between us begin to further....i was so sad and hurt... it wasn't my choice to be a prefect as i reali enjoy my time with her...i was nominated to be a prefect so i doesn't have a choice...i'm reali sad at that period....
Until now, we are in da same university... our gap is stil far away...even we are sitting in da same car, sitting side by side in a restaurant, standing in front of each other and even talking to each other... i cant find da bond that we used to have.... we always talk about da same thing over and over again... God knows what happen.... Even she invited me to our primary gathering or outings...i'm reali glad that she invite me...i'm so happy to go...but she is with our friends most of the time while i feel like I went there alone...is not complaining but it is how i felt at that time.... I was so sad and i'm smiling...surprisingly i can do that....
I found out that we have da same habit, same attitude, same thinking....we are too much alike and in common that's why we have da problem... I'm sensitive in listening but not while talking and so does she...so both of us are hurt by each other's word.... I'm praying to God...how nice if i were to sensitive while talking but not listening.... How i wish i never hurt her.... How i wish i never done those silly mistakes..... How stupid i am to lose such a nice friend like her.... How i wish i can turn back da time when we were together....
In this very moment while i'm writing about her...i'm thinking about her... i reali missed da time when we used to spend time with each other.... I am here to apologize to her with my whole heart... I would do anything just to mend my mistakes for us to be as close as before....
I'm sorry, Wen Yi... Will you forgive me?
Saturday, September 29, 2007
Friday, September 28, 2007
buddy vs bestie
Tis post actually should update by yesterday or tis morning...but i was too tired to even on the laptop...haha... 3 sumthing in da morning only i reach home ler...from mamak...haha...
Yesterday was da day when my dear dear came back from Port Dickson... i went to ktm serdang to meet him...hehe...miss him alotx... i was kinda irrational as my dad told me...haha.. i took a bus to ktm n took da same bus back from ktm....kinda funny huh? juz to meet my dear dear....irrational ler? but tis is how i enjoy my life... live in unexpected....unplanned....whatever i feel like doing then juz do it! (familiar huh? it's from Nike's slogan la....lol....) Now is holiday la weh...stil wanna plan everything ah? very stressed up de la... keep on plan what should i do...how should it be done...what is da consequences of doing it.... sienz la weh....talk like tis oso sien la....summore live like tis? mayb tis is wat u enjoy but not my style la...haha.....
After meeting my dear dear...at night we went for mamak session wit Kang Xian.... During da starting of da mamak session...was so so so sien....like duno wat to talk but keep on findings stupid topics to talk.... Mayb after warming up... we talked non stop n laugh non stop.... until we din even noticed it is 3am edi... haha....actually we still havent finish talking...but dear dear is too tired edi...he said he cannot tahan edi....pity him lo....so tired stil have to join our mamak session....sorry o...dear dear.....
Stop those mushy stuff....haha....back to da topic....buddy vs bestie...usually buddy is used by guys i think...then bestie is used by gals...but then for me buddy in da same time can be ur bestie....haha.... Da same person i mentioned is Kang Xian da fittest guy!! haha.... dear dear wont jealous de la....haha.... He is da guy or friend that i've da best friendship ever....so who said guy n gal cannot be friends? muz be in special relationship? siapa cakap punya? haha..... even there's so many many friends passed by my life...there's no 1 who can stop so long in my life...(exclude dear dear)
You might be thinking...where is other gals? yea yea....i have gal friends either but duno y they juz cant click with me...perhaps with my straight forward punya sikap they cannot tahan me lo...not all la...some only la...
Since form 1 i know this fella...he was like damn funny la...look like a malay guy(mix too much with malays ma....summore duno how to speak chinese....'banana'....)He is a chinese! haha.... i knew him from the school bus(i took school bus since da 1st day i went to kindergarden....surprisingly i din cry....haha....) Because i cannot tahan for not talking....i always turn to da back seat to talk to him...even he was kinda like "oh...ok....icic...." style of replying me...it still wont stop me from keep on blah-ing....haha...stubborn ler?? i juz cannot tahan of being quiet la.... then tis 'malay' guy very weird 1...he said he got home tuition near my house so everyday he will walk wit my through the alley and pass by my house juz to go to da 'home tuition place'....erm...it makes me kinda weird lo...then ah...everyday whenever he successfully escape from prefect for taking sweets up from canteen...he surely will offer me sweets when he saw me in da koperasi... how nice rite? i was wondering how come tis guy likes to eat sweets so much ah? dun scared diabetes ah? haha.... and then there's 1 day...both of us din notice that it's Valentine's Day...he offer sweets to me as usual...and i juz take it as usual...then Amirul(a fatty) suddenly shout out loud :"hari ini Valentine's Day la...apa u dua org buat ini? bagi gula pun tak bagi sye ke? Oh...aku dah tau... u dua pastinye dating ya?" Both of us was like stunned n blurred....haha.... then da rumours of both of us r dating have been running around da school until FORM 5!!! "Thanks" to Amirul...haha.... That's how it proven that guys can be loud n big speakers too...so dun said gals r da only 1 who can be loud n big speakers....
After that incident....both of us was kinda weird but then after a while...we feel like there's no need for us to feel like tat as it is juz rumours....it's not true!!! haha.... then our friendship is stil on like usual... but then there's few gals happenned to passed by our lives...erm....his live....impact to his la...shock to mine...shock is because there are stil gals who are jealous with me n him punya friendship....apalah.....friendship only what...i think maybe they thought da rumours are true....and me n those gals punya friendship oso affected a bit la... Impact is because this had caused 1 of his break-ups....feel kinda bad for him....sorry,dude....
Whenever me n my parents argued...surely i'll call him n go to his house juz to chill...then he juz know how to say...chill,gal....haha.... everytime when he saw his phone rang n it was me, he'll surely know that i need to chill at his house again....haha....pity him sumtimes....but now have to pity my dear dear lo....he has taken tat responsibility....not to say taken....it is more like inherit or force to have that lo...haha.....
Back to Kang Xian...whenever i have computer problems or i need any software, i'll ask him for help.... or i can say that whenever i need help i'll refer to him 1st....haha....now turned to my dear dear le....Kang Xian aka Jason should feel relieved edi rite? haha..... So you muz be thinking...my dear dear should be my buddy n bestie lo? da answer is no....or not reali....i stil refer things back to Jason....becoz i dowan my dear dear to feel tat i'm troublesome...haha....pity Jason....Until now...whenever i have relationship problem...he is da 1 i consult...haha...can be his case study in his course edi lo....he can be a very pro counsellor after my cases....maybe?
Even his parents made me feel like i'm their daughter ler... even some times when i hang out too late wit Jason, his mother even reminded him that :"she is ppl's daughter ah.... " meaning muz take care of ppl's daughter...haha.... i juz feel very warm....his parents take care of me alot...even took me for dinners n nalanda session.... Here i wanna thanks his parents... Thank you,uncle n auntie....
Da bad thing is...i cant join Jason's clubbing session because of :"I'm ppl's daughter...." haih....then tis has become Jason's reason of not bringing me out sometimes.... Bad Jason!! Bluek!!
Sometimes i'm feel very weird because now my dear dear n him seems to be reali close ler...closer than me n Jason ler....very weird hor? feel damn gay la... guy n guy....haha..... In a way it's good because my dear dear can mix well with my buddy aka bestie....hehe....
Erm....now i'm running out of ideas on what to say edi...haha.... i need to go for lunch lo....Ciao~
Yesterday was da day when my dear dear came back from Port Dickson... i went to ktm serdang to meet him...hehe...miss him alotx... i was kinda irrational as my dad told me...haha.. i took a bus to ktm n took da same bus back from ktm....kinda funny huh? juz to meet my dear dear....irrational ler? but tis is how i enjoy my life... live in unexpected....unplanned....whatever i feel like doing then juz do it! (familiar huh? it's from Nike's slogan la....lol....) Now is holiday la weh...stil wanna plan everything ah? very stressed up de la... keep on plan what should i do...how should it be done...what is da consequences of doing it.... sienz la weh....talk like tis oso sien la....summore live like tis? mayb tis is wat u enjoy but not my style la...haha.....
After meeting my dear dear...at night we went for mamak session wit Kang Xian.... During da starting of da mamak session...was so so so sien....like duno wat to talk but keep on findings stupid topics to talk.... Mayb after warming up... we talked non stop n laugh non stop.... until we din even noticed it is 3am edi... haha....actually we still havent finish talking...but dear dear is too tired edi...he said he cannot tahan edi....pity him lo....so tired stil have to join our mamak session....sorry o...dear dear.....
Stop those mushy stuff....haha....back to da topic....buddy vs bestie...usually buddy is used by guys i think...then bestie is used by gals...but then for me buddy in da same time can be ur bestie....haha.... Da same person i mentioned is Kang Xian da fittest guy!! haha.... dear dear wont jealous de la....haha.... He is da guy or friend that i've da best friendship ever....so who said guy n gal cannot be friends? muz be in special relationship? siapa cakap punya? haha..... even there's so many many friends passed by my life...there's no 1 who can stop so long in my life...(exclude dear dear)
You might be thinking...where is other gals? yea yea....i have gal friends either but duno y they juz cant click with me...perhaps with my straight forward punya sikap they cannot tahan me lo...not all la...some only la...
Since form 1 i know this fella...he was like damn funny la...look like a malay guy(mix too much with malays ma....summore duno how to speak chinese....'banana'....)He is a chinese! haha.... i knew him from the school bus(i took school bus since da 1st day i went to kindergarden....surprisingly i din cry....haha....) Because i cannot tahan for not talking....i always turn to da back seat to talk to him...even he was kinda like "oh...ok....icic...." style of replying me...it still wont stop me from keep on blah-ing....haha...stubborn ler?? i juz cannot tahan of being quiet la.... then tis 'malay' guy very weird 1...he said he got home tuition near my house so everyday he will walk wit my through the alley and pass by my house juz to go to da 'home tuition place'....erm...it makes me kinda weird lo...then ah...everyday whenever he successfully escape from prefect for taking sweets up from canteen...he surely will offer me sweets when he saw me in da koperasi... how nice rite? i was wondering how come tis guy likes to eat sweets so much ah? dun scared diabetes ah? haha.... and then there's 1 day...both of us din notice that it's Valentine's Day...he offer sweets to me as usual...and i juz take it as usual...then Amirul(a fatty) suddenly shout out loud :"hari ini Valentine's Day la...apa u dua org buat ini? bagi gula pun tak bagi sye ke? Oh...aku dah tau... u dua pastinye dating ya?" Both of us was like stunned n blurred....haha.... then da rumours of both of us r dating have been running around da school until FORM 5!!! "Thanks" to Amirul...haha.... That's how it proven that guys can be loud n big speakers too...so dun said gals r da only 1 who can be loud n big speakers....
After that incident....both of us was kinda weird but then after a while...we feel like there's no need for us to feel like tat as it is juz rumours....it's not true!!! haha.... then our friendship is stil on like usual... but then there's few gals happenned to passed by our lives...erm....his live....impact to his la...shock to mine...shock is because there are stil gals who are jealous with me n him punya friendship....apalah.....friendship only what...i think maybe they thought da rumours are true....and me n those gals punya friendship oso affected a bit la... Impact is because this had caused 1 of his break-ups....feel kinda bad for him....sorry,dude....
Whenever me n my parents argued...surely i'll call him n go to his house juz to chill...then he juz know how to say...chill,gal....haha.... everytime when he saw his phone rang n it was me, he'll surely know that i need to chill at his house again....haha....pity him sumtimes....but now have to pity my dear dear lo....he has taken tat responsibility....not to say taken....it is more like inherit or force to have that lo...haha.....
Back to Kang Xian...whenever i have computer problems or i need any software, i'll ask him for help.... or i can say that whenever i need help i'll refer to him 1st....haha....now turned to my dear dear le....Kang Xian aka Jason should feel relieved edi rite? haha..... So you muz be thinking...my dear dear should be my buddy n bestie lo? da answer is no....or not reali....i stil refer things back to Jason....becoz i dowan my dear dear to feel tat i'm troublesome...haha....pity Jason....Until now...whenever i have relationship problem...he is da 1 i consult...haha...can be his case study in his course edi lo....he can be a very pro counsellor after my cases....maybe?
Even his parents made me feel like i'm their daughter ler... even some times when i hang out too late wit Jason, his mother even reminded him that :"she is ppl's daughter ah.... " meaning muz take care of ppl's daughter...haha.... i juz feel very warm....his parents take care of me alot...even took me for dinners n nalanda session.... Here i wanna thanks his parents... Thank you,uncle n auntie....
Da bad thing is...i cant join Jason's clubbing session because of :"I'm ppl's daughter...." haih....then tis has become Jason's reason of not bringing me out sometimes.... Bad Jason!! Bluek!!
Sometimes i'm feel very weird because now my dear dear n him seems to be reali close ler...closer than me n Jason ler....very weird hor? feel damn gay la... guy n guy....haha..... In a way it's good because my dear dear can mix well with my buddy aka bestie....hehe....
Erm....now i'm running out of ideas on what to say edi...haha.... i need to go for lunch lo....Ciao~
Tuesday, September 25, 2007
back~
haha....missing in action for more than 1 month!! time flies....many things had happened....tell ya 1 by 1....
11 of August..i received my belated birthday present from my dear dear which is kinda unexpected....(not reali late la...i said it's my birthday week to my dear dear as i wanna be birthday gal for a week...hehe....erm....might as well next time make it month la...haha...)guess wat he gave me.... a tamagotchi.....original...version 3... very unexpected rite? haha.... yea, he is a very unexpected person which attracts me...becoz i dun like a dull life...i think everyone oso dun like to have a dull n boring life isn't it? haha.... previous post i mentioned that dear dear forgot to give me da 'birthday present' is not tamagotchi... it is my mp3(erm...he paid when i got it from pc fair...) which is spoiled then my dear dear healed it to gave it back to me as my birthday present...haha....kinda geram oso huh?that 1 oso can count as birthday present... sumtimes he reali made me geram till wanna exploded!! and then when he act cute and bian zui...i'll surely melt...haha....bingo!! that's my weakness!! wonder that tis 'tough' gal oso have weakness ler? haha....
erm....week 14 i started to worry about exams then study week started n ended up everyday gaming...then everytime when i enter and exit from da exam hall i will regret for wat i have done da day b4... i even play until 5am instead of revising during exam period...ridiculous huh? da feeling keep on happenning until da last day....haha...not tat i din play games on da last day...is exam finally ends....i can play games non-stop!! haha....
During exam, i answer those questions through my instinct...haha.... if i dun remember then i'll guess from da word...haha.... Interactionist view of conflict... i stil remember from my Organizational Human Behavior exam...haha.... i guess it is like interaction between ppl create conflict but it improves da initial idea...more interaction develop better ideas...haha....da exact answer is in da text book...go refer urself la...haha....i told my fren bout it after da exam... She is one tutormates of mine... Hui Wen...she said:"Wow!! u reali freestyle lar....guessing answers through the words from question....ur answer oso very unique ah....haha...." look....no one tell me like that b4 so i was stunned a while then only i catch her meaning....haha.... Free style? Am i? tell me....
I've juz finished my exams yesterday... i felt relieved but worried about wat my results gonna be... haih... u all muz be laughing saying tat i should enjoy my holiday edi...3 months la weh...if wanna worry why not worry about it earlier b4 exams? right right.... so today i enjoyed my day!!! haha....even da worry punya feeling havent gone fully....haha... i went to Sunway Piramid with my dear dear...haha... i heard there are many nice nice bags selling there but i din see any...haha....mayb i stil havent explore it lo....anyone who know where got nice nice bags can tell me ah? nice shoes me oso dun mind de....haha..... we watched 2 movies which is kinda unexpected as we thought to watch only 1...haha....we used to be unexpected...we watched beauty & the 7 beast...hong kong film...kinda funny...erm...another 1 is Knocked out.... that movie is kinda useful or should i said knowledgable(did i spell it wrongly?)to me...mayb to ladies....(as my dear dear agreed to what da movie is trying to convey) Men need their time to do wat they loved!! they are human as they too have their passion!! so dun tie ur man up!! give freedom to them as their heart is always belongs to u!!! haha....dun juz think about urself...think about them...u can have chit-chat time wit ur besties so why dun they have their quality time with their buddies? (I'll try to do it....erm....try oni o...no guarantee....haha....)
after da movies, we had an ice cream from New Zealand Neutral as dinner...if i'm not mistaken...i juz know is ice cream la...haha....as our dinner...yeap! dinner... becoz our lunch at Manhattan Fish Market is too full until we have finish 2 movies stil can feel it....
Tomorrow my dear dear is going to Port Dickson with his classmates for vacation...how nice...so i'll be single but not available for this 2 days...haha... i'll need to catch up wit my frens and buddies too....
Here i wish my dear dear n his classmates have a safe journey... May God bless them!! have a fun n enjoyable moments together...as they were working quite hard during da finals.... they deserve to have a vacation....
ciao~
11 of August..i received my belated birthday present from my dear dear which is kinda unexpected....(not reali late la...i said it's my birthday week to my dear dear as i wanna be birthday gal for a week...hehe....erm....might as well next time make it month la...haha...)guess wat he gave me.... a tamagotchi.....original...version 3... very unexpected rite? haha.... yea, he is a very unexpected person which attracts me...becoz i dun like a dull life...i think everyone oso dun like to have a dull n boring life isn't it? haha.... previous post i mentioned that dear dear forgot to give me da 'birthday present' is not tamagotchi... it is my mp3(erm...he paid when i got it from pc fair...) which is spoiled then my dear dear healed it to gave it back to me as my birthday present...haha....kinda geram oso huh?that 1 oso can count as birthday present... sumtimes he reali made me geram till wanna exploded!! and then when he act cute and bian zui...i'll surely melt...haha....bingo!! that's my weakness!! wonder that tis 'tough' gal oso have weakness ler? haha....
erm....week 14 i started to worry about exams then study week started n ended up everyday gaming...then everytime when i enter and exit from da exam hall i will regret for wat i have done da day b4... i even play until 5am instead of revising during exam period...ridiculous huh? da feeling keep on happenning until da last day....haha...not tat i din play games on da last day...is exam finally ends....i can play games non-stop!! haha....
During exam, i answer those questions through my instinct...haha.... if i dun remember then i'll guess from da word...haha.... Interactionist view of conflict... i stil remember from my Organizational Human Behavior exam...haha.... i guess it is like interaction between ppl create conflict but it improves da initial idea...more interaction develop better ideas...haha....da exact answer is in da text book...go refer urself la...haha....i told my fren bout it after da exam... She is one tutormates of mine... Hui Wen...she said:"Wow!! u reali freestyle lar....guessing answers through the words from question....ur answer oso very unique ah....haha...." look....no one tell me like that b4 so i was stunned a while then only i catch her meaning....haha.... Free style? Am i? tell me....
I've juz finished my exams yesterday... i felt relieved but worried about wat my results gonna be... haih... u all muz be laughing saying tat i should enjoy my holiday edi...3 months la weh...if wanna worry why not worry about it earlier b4 exams? right right.... so today i enjoyed my day!!! haha....even da worry punya feeling havent gone fully....haha... i went to Sunway Piramid with my dear dear...haha... i heard there are many nice nice bags selling there but i din see any...haha....mayb i stil havent explore it lo....anyone who know where got nice nice bags can tell me ah? nice shoes me oso dun mind de....haha..... we watched 2 movies which is kinda unexpected as we thought to watch only 1...haha....we used to be unexpected...we watched beauty & the 7 beast...hong kong film...kinda funny...erm...another 1 is Knocked out.... that movie is kinda useful or should i said knowledgable(did i spell it wrongly?)to me...mayb to ladies....(as my dear dear agreed to what da movie is trying to convey) Men need their time to do wat they loved!! they are human as they too have their passion!! so dun tie ur man up!! give freedom to them as their heart is always belongs to u!!! haha....dun juz think about urself...think about them...u can have chit-chat time wit ur besties so why dun they have their quality time with their buddies? (I'll try to do it....erm....try oni o...no guarantee....haha....)
after da movies, we had an ice cream from New Zealand Neutral as dinner...if i'm not mistaken...i juz know is ice cream la...haha....as our dinner...yeap! dinner... becoz our lunch at Manhattan Fish Market is too full until we have finish 2 movies stil can feel it....
Tomorrow my dear dear is going to Port Dickson with his classmates for vacation...how nice...so i'll be single but not available for this 2 days...haha... i'll need to catch up wit my frens and buddies too....
Here i wish my dear dear n his classmates have a safe journey... May God bless them!! have a fun n enjoyable moments together...as they were working quite hard during da finals.... they deserve to have a vacation....
ciao~
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